Manipulative.

These days I just could not find time to organise my thoughts. It's now one week till the end of semester and I still have 5 projects to deal with. No, I'm not here to complain about the work load. I'm here to complain about my group member(s).

From first year till now, I am the leader in almost every assignment or group work. Even if I am not the "official" leader, I am the one taking the initiative to work it out. I am lucky to have a partner in crime - she can understand what I mean and produce the work with quality. She is a good one, but still, she is a follower. The other two members - one with a sudden bursts of indifference, and sometimes will find fault in my ideas (she is still bearable because her work is okay); one lacking in professionalism and quality of her work, plus the tendency to go wayyyy past deadline that I have set. It's tiring like hell - to have these people dragging me when I have 6 subjects to take this semester, not to mention individual assignments as well. I asked for ideas but it usually end up with me suggesting, and end up me structuring, me conducting, me dividing the jobs, me checking, me proofreading, me printing, not to mention that the others only have to do their assigned parts while I have to do my assigned part (which usually carries the most weightage) and the "leader" job that I must do.

Picture this:

I am in the midst of doing another assignment when one of my members ask:"Hey have you divide the parts that we have to do for this course?" Or "Hey have you checked the part I submitted? Anything to correct?" 

Hey dear sister, I have things to do and why should I be the one dividing parts? Can't you tell me which part you want to do, or you are confident in doing?  I need time to work on my part as well, and here you come asking me if I have checked your part or not? Have you ever consider that I have to split my time up to check four parts of assignment and you only have to do one? Can't you be more sensible and offer help?  Or at least give me some space and shut the fuck up? I ain't need any one to order me around if I am the leader!

And when I ask you to do corrections, DON'T GIVE ME THAT BITCH FACE! If you are not concerned about the marks that you will receive, or the quality of the work that you are submitting in, I DO! And don't go around giving me excuses or praising me that I SHOULD DO MORE JOB BECAUSE I AM COMPETENT AND SMART AND SOOOOOOO RELIABLE AND YOU ARE NOT! GODDAMN HELL YOU ALSO GOT DEAN LIST AWARD AND YOU RESULTS ARE NOT THAT WORSE THAN ME! 

And when I set the deadline at 10 pm means 10 pm! WHY IS THERE NEVER A TIME THAT YOU ARE PUNCTUAL?! Don't tell me that you are sorry! I have had enough! 

I don't understand how can a person not improve a single bit for the three years I have known her. I simply cannot. Every time I see the face I feel like making her vanish into thin air, or gnawing my own eyes out so that I won't be reminded of her existence. Why should I be the one tolerating with her toxic behaviours? I ain't no saint because when I try to tell her to change, she wouldn't listen. I ain't no friend because I did not feel appreciated. What kind of a friend am I to her, if she dares to use her toxic tactics on me? It's better if she is not in my group. At least I wouldn't have extra emotional burden to top up my piling assignments and projects. 

Please make my live easier, can't you?