Wednesday, 28 June 2017

写作


一直以来写作都是很突发性的事情,灵感来了不敲门直驱而入,我随手便抓了支笔在纸张任何一处空白上开始洋洋洒洒。灵感这东西有时如电光火石,刹那即逝,回头已不见芳踪;有时却如缠绵情愫,绵绵不绝,回甘入心间;这便是我纪念生活点滴的方式。 随着岁月,我书写的文字以填补扉页上空白的方式,在我无意间翻阅书本时,一一跳跃出来 。Write for own pleasure 是我一贯固执的坚持,然而如今我才发觉,是我低估了自己笔下文字的值。They deserve their credits, they deserve their very own screen time, no matter how short it is. 在我人生的戏剧里,他们不应该被禁锢,不应该被限制成我自己的娱乐品。 是我太自私了,让他们无法有出彩的那一刻。是我让世俗红尘为他们披上层层沉沉的灰,让他们疲惫得喘不过气来,随即等待他们的是没落,穷途。 

看着弟弟这位傲慢, 且平日目中无人的中学生对文字的执着与尊敬,让我深感羞愧。 我的弟弟每当写作时都有一套对待他所谓的写作用品的方式 。他把每一样文具都视为神一般的存在,将它们一一摆放在default的位置: 摊开白纸摆在正中央,泡上一杯白咖啡,开始提笔写作。若没有这套“仪式”,他便觉得不安 ,无法将灵感发挥得极致。他的心中一直有着一位写作之神,心有可畏。 我一直不明白为何弟弟每当写作时便如武侠小说里头的大侠般闭门修炼,足不出户也不进食,后来才发现原来写作这回事,并不能轻怠,必须至高的尊敬来信奉写作之神,才能望有朝一日被眷顾。这,是他的theory, 是belief, 也是principle.

是时候检讨自己对写作的态度了。或许没错,写作是一门信仰,只有最虔诚的信徒才能抵达救赎的另一端彼岸。 而我终日漂浮,在写作这路途上不见天日,本就是我应受的惩罚。


Tuesday, 27 June 2017

Reminisce


Sleepless night.

It's been a long time since graduation that we have a long, engaging conversation, nearly 5 hours. The details of the conversation is still ringing by my ears, so clear, so defeaning and annoyingly sweet ~ it makes me reluctant to fall asleep. 

It's very surprising- that the only friends that I am currrently keeping in touch with are the ones I have known for the shortest period of time. I did not keep in touch with my primary schoolmates, bad memories they gave me (that's a very long story); I only have 1 to 2 close friends during my secondary school days, and although I don't want to admit it, I feel like we are slowly drifting apart. The current Form 6 gang is the ONLY people who will gather together during holiday breaks. Never in my life (which is full of difficult friendships) that I would I would imagine me having the opportunity to hang out with a large group of people, yet did not feel that I am being alienated. This is the first time- and sincerely hope it will continue till we grow old.

I never thought that I am seriously enjoying the conversation: I am glad that I made the effort to get out of my lazy zone and get out of my house to meet them. The recent updates of my friends on how they are doing, and a few sprinkles of school-time memories make me feel young again. I am glad that I made the decision to study my Form 6 in Jit Sin, although I still didn't quite like the school environment. Overall, I am nothing but glad.

I have this sudden feeling of nostalgia- I am missing those days when we were in Form 6. I regretted not showing more of my true self to my friends; and suddenly realised that one and a half year is simply too short. Yet, we are still able to tune into conversation harmoniously after all these years, and a sudden wave of emotions hit me. I don't know what it is: maybe because I am touched. 

And suddenly I am afraid of losing them. 


Saturday, 10 June 2017

Millennial Love @nigahiga



What a modern day love song would sound like in the language of Millennials...


Why, this turned out to be a nice song!

#ML

Friday, 9 June 2017

G-DRAGON - '무제(無題) (Untitled, 2014)'


G-DRAGON - '무제(無題) (Untitled, 2014)' 

Two of my favourite artists dropped songs on the same day! How blessed my soul is <3 

English Translation; 

I know that it's difficult and hard
To come back to me
I know that you're scared
Of getting hurt again
Even on the day you left
I made you cry with my cruel words
I turned my back on you and I regret it, I'm sorry


Please just once
If I can just see you
I'm okay with losing everything I have
I'll meet you, even if it's in a dream
And we can love again
Just as we are


It might be easier to just die
Than to earn your forgiveness
I sing this song, but I don't know
If my truthfulness will get through to you
"I want you to be happy"
I couldn't even tell that simple lie
I just pray that you'll come back, I'm sorry


Please just once
If I can just see you
I'm okay with losing everything I have
I'll meet you, even if it's in a dream
And we can love again
Just as we are


You think it's over, that it's our last time
But I can't accept those thoughts
I can't let go cuz' you never know
My love for you, your love for me
We'll never find a love the same again
Nobody knows
We always know


Please just once
If I can just see you
I'm okay with losing everything I have
I'll meet you, even if it's in a dream
And we can love again
As we are


Right now, this moment is passing
If you can forget everything
Our memories, the times we were happy
No, I'll meet you again in the next life
We'll love each other once again
Just as we did before 

4 o'clock by RM & V (BTS)



Such a beautiful song.

네시 (4 O'CLOCK) (2017)

Produced by RM, V

Arranged by SHAUN

Recording Engineer:
RM @ Mon Studio
Slow Rabbit @ Carrot Express

Mix Engineer:
고현정 @ Koko Sound Studio (Assisted by 김경환)


English Translation: 

One day,
I wrote a long, long letter to the moon
It would not be brighter than you 
But I lighted a small candle

At a dusky park
A nameless bird that sings 
Where are you 
Oh you

Why are you crying
You and I are the only ones here
Me and you
Oh you

Following into the deep night
The sound of you singing
Brings the red morning
A step, and another step

The dawn passes
And when that moon falls asleep
The blue shade that stayed with me disappears

Even today, I live moderately
I walk in pace, moderately wearing down 
The sun suffocates me
And the world strips me naked
I can't help it, there's no other way
I collect myself that's shattered beneath the moonlight
I call you moonchild
We are the children of the moon
I breathe the cold night air
Yes we're livin and dyin
at the same time
But you can open your eyes for now
Just like that any movie, like the line (from the movie)
The entire world is blue inside the moonlight

At a dusky park
A nameless bird that sings 
Where are you 
Oh you

Why are you crying
You and I are the only ones here
Me and you
Oh you

Following into the deep night
The sound of you singing
Brings the red morning
A step, and another step

The dawn passes
And when that moon falls asleep
The blue shade that stayed with me disappears

Following into the deep night
The sound of you singing
Brings the red morning
A step, and another step

The dawn passes
And when that moon falls asleep
The blue shade that stayed with me